Operation Valentines Day

Blood shot across the white pre-warmed hospital blanket that covered my legs.
“Oh, I am so so sorry Mr. Saunders” She cried.
It must have been the blood and the look of horror on her soft face that triggered my unexpected and abrupt burst of laughter, causing me to spray spit and snot all over myself. As I finished wiping the last of my face off with my hospital gown I watched with nervous tension as this peripheral butcher moved in on yet another one of my veins with her 100% sanitary 16-gauge needle with built in IV catheter.
“Happy Valentines Day” She chuckled as she slid in a second needle.
Yes…I suppose it was Valentines Day wasn’t it...
As I slowly lay back in my pre-op hospital bed and thought to myself “If God simply has a sense of humor…then Cupid must be Groucho fucking Marx.